We all have years we label as our worst. "I hated sophomore year" one might say. "Being a 7th grader was awful" another. My worst would be 2009. It is not school related however. I would be in New Jersey, having moved here the year prior in 2008. I have rarely been what you would call a sad person, but it was in 2009 where I lost motivation to do anything important. I also lost a lot of weight. To put that into perspective, a normal weight for a 13 year old boy would be somewhere between 100 and 120 pounds. I weighed 77. That might not be clinically unhealthy, but it's not something you want to be at that age.
I didn't do anything productive. I watched TV over two hours a day. I didn't really attend a church on a regular basis. By definition, you could say I wasn't doing anything with my time. What was my problem? Why didn't have I any inner happiness? Why didn't I care about life? When I took a CT scan to see why I was losing so much weight, I got the answer I expected...
There was nothing wrong with me, I was doing this to myself.
Why? Was I not a Christian at that point? Well, I definitely believed in God. But I didn't live by His Words. And that was the problem. Simply believing God exists doesn't do anything for you unless you live by that belief. Many people believe that someone created everything. Many believe in a higher power above the clouds. But if you don't let your mind and soul live by that belief, that inner happiness, peace, will not be there. As Philippians 4:7 states....
And the peace of God, which passes all understanding, shall keep your hearts and minds through Christ Jesus.I didn't have that peace. I didn't know the Bible or the many great things it promises. Many others are in that same boat. Believing that God exists is one step, but one can't stop there. I grew up going to church, but it wasn't until 2011 when I came to an understanding of what trusting in God meant.
Attend a local church. Get involved. Read through Psalms, Proverbs, and the Gospels. These are some of the best things a person can do when he/she is lacking the "peace of God." We don't have to wallow in our circumstances. Sometimes we have to make an extra effort. I knew after I took that CT scan I was going to have to do some work in fixing myself up. I made myself healthy on the outside, but it wasn't until 2010 when I started attending my local church where I became a happier individual, knowing that I was made with a purpose. In 2011, I became a follower of God.
Life is always changing. The world is always changing. But God is unchanged. You can stand above your circumstances by having faith, love, and hope in Jesus Christ.
77 is definitely pretty light! Hopefully you've managed to put on a lot since then. I've lost almost 100 pounds (Seriously) and I'm still almost double that. I basically needed to do the opposite I suppose. I can barely imagine how you must have looked at that point. (My memory cannot go that far back) I'm not really sure when I became a Christian. I really should remember the day, but I can't pinpoint it. I'd probably say that it's been a few years since I truly got to know God. Unfortunately, my memory grows worse as each year passes so I'll never really remember the day. I barely remember my last Christmas. Still, I don't need my memory to enjoy the current days.
ReplyDeleteThe right Church can definitely make a difference. I've been to quite a few of them in the past, but Times Square Church is definitely my favorite. The Church that you're going to has definitely seemed to help and if I recall correctly, it's also how you started this blog! Keep up the good work Destroyer!